in observance of a major revenue-earning day for greeting card companies, here’s a shout out to my old man. he’s a genuinely quirky and bizarre character. he often picks things up and smells them, loves animals, likes to know how things work, has a very expressive face, likes junk food and sweets, and possesses beautiful penmanship (which i try to emulate to this day). below are some interesting and/or funny quotes from conversations. good times!

on love:
(i really wanted to make this a simple comic but was too lazy and lacking time)

dad: “in a relationship, it is more important for the male to love the female more. if the man loves the female more then the relationship has a better chance of lasting. he can take care of her and appreciate her more.”
me: “but dad, don’t you think people can love each other equally?”
dad: “that never happens in this world”
(ouch! i guess i inherited some of that cynicism)

“a bad relationship can ruin a girl’s life for 10 years
i know so many relationships that have ruined girls lives, so badly”

“between a man and woman, if there are complications then they shouldn’t get into it”

“dan dan, listen to me, this is very important. if something doesn’t seem right, then get out of it. don’t waste your time. if a man doesn’t know what he wants, get out while you can!”

“if you really really really love a man, you’ll want to marry and have kids with him”
(yeah i rolled my eyes too)

random inside-jokey goodies:

my sister said, “dad, you’re like the basement.”
(when i slapped his shoulder and a dust cloud rose from his fleece jacket)

“sporty but not comfortable”
(when asked about the rental car, dodge charger, that we took down to LA)

“i like angelina jolie because she has a strong personality”

“i think SF is going to be a poor city in a couple years”
(umm, YEAH)

“ting ting, are your ready to see the star?!”
(to my sister as we approached griffith observatory)

“i don’t think that can be hot. not trendy enough”
(wish i remember what this was about)

“that nut help us a lot!”
(commenting on the bags of nuts we bought from casa de fruta for the long drive down to LA)

“why is that man’s hand on that woman’s butt?”
(classic)

“once i was so disoriented i wore two different shoes to work”
(on how bad his allergies were)

“finally everything come alive”
(after we turned on the car radio after hours of silence)

him: “we should take copper here”
me: “copper’s dead”
(at a half moon bay beach; copper is my beloved dog that i had to put down in college)

“you look pretty today”
(we all need to hear it)

“can i do anything for you when you’re in china? i have a lot of connections there, like mobs”
(mirthquake!)

“i could eat a horse”
(when he was very hungry)

“hey listen, when i say i’m warm, i’m warm!”
(when we were expressing concern about whether or not he was wearing enough)

and we end with my favorite photo of him
(check the fly scarf)

to two accomplished graduates whom i’ve known my entire life! there’s plenty of pride bursting from my wheezy chest.

my sis! christina, BA sociology, uc berkeley. on her way to being a counselor/therapist

jenelle, JD, george washington university (and she’s gonna teach at the immigration clinic this summer!)

and a loving shout out to brie, BA sociology, uc berkeley. may she no longer have to suffer the lack of ________ during her tenure at cal

my mom sent me these text messages tonight:

” thank you for your quick replying take care we are watch movie cloverfield so so scary”

” the movie so scary”

” tell you the truth mom very brave but this movie really scar mom most of time mom closed eyes during movie”

one day, i will master the art of blogging brevity. but until then, i don’t care if i’m 85 and on my goddang death bed sportin’ a colostomy bag. i WILL finish this bloody travelogue. oh yes…i will…(a la wayne).

****************

wake up later than desired; i bitchily rush christina so we can make it out the door. we’ve got a big day ahead of us!

breakfast. here’s sister looking fierce in cafe sabarsky, a polished viennese cafe that exudes old-world charm (glossy wood paneling, waiters in black vests). it belongs to the neu gallerie (german and austrian art). when we leave there’s a line of folks waiting to get into the klimt exhibition

impeccable apple strudel. tastes authentic, not that i know what an “authentic” apple strudel should be like, but probably akin to this. we also order a bowl of goulash, which isn’t anything like its hungarian counterpart. we savor it until chris realizes that the guys across the way are straight up laughing at us for sloppily slurping from the same bowl like wolves. we remain calm, reminding ourselves that we are the true civilized ones. it takes a lot of self-control to prevent christina from basically bitch slapping the dudes.

after that bitter experience, we walk down museum mile to the guggenheim for the critically acclaimed cai guo-qiang show. making it to this installation was a top priority on this trip

there’s a no-photo policy, but i can’t help myself. you wouldn’t believe how crowded it is. the staggering amount of people may ruin lesser shows, but because this one is so good, the jostling isn’t too terrible

so out of this world

aaaaaand they’re OFF!

but they smash into an invisible barrier that’s symbolic of the berlin wall

all life-sized wolves made out of paper mache, fake fur, and other materials

cai guo-qiang — a contemporary chinese artist who is known for his “explosive” art employing dynamite, fireworks, and gunpowder — really just “blows” my mind. this show is the apotheosis of a successful art exhibition. it’s engaging and dynamic, larger than life; a true spectacle on all accounts. but it’s not just dazzling eye candy: there’s a lot of depth and philosophy at work. it’s an experience that wraps up all your senses into a mindbending blankie. bravo to him, and the guggenheim, for presenting one of the most exciting visual arts experiences i’ve had in a long, long time

this makes me feel like a pedo

no NYC trip is complete w/o an excursion to the union square green market. we breeze on through, perhaps as a result of being spoiled bay area farmers market patrons

after buying some kicks on sale at shoe mania, we stumble upon max brenner, a big ol’ chocolate restaurant. it’s like…if willy wonka made a restaurant in the late 90s. there’s a strange, ambiguous fusion of fantasy gaudy (spray painted butterflies on chocolate pipes that criss cross the ceiling) and worldly style (bowls of different cocoa powder lining a ledge)

gross, but i’d be lying if i said i wasn’t somewhat intrigued and willing

i don’t think so

of course we get something! here’s christina with their fancy version of an oreo shake

liquid milk chocolate. literally, that’s what it tastes and feels like. i still think about this deathly concoction. i’ve yet to find something quite like this in the yay area

oh man, what luck! first we come across max brenner, and now, forbidden planet! a mecca for all nerds. it’s almost like coming come. i’m pretty stoked

this sneaky shot fails in doing the mammoth store any justice

more or less one of the coolest, funniest things ever

18 miles of books. easy to get lost here. the art section alone would require a good two hours. atypical of landmarks, this one actually has smart, stylish souvenirs / branded merch, like cute totes

one cup to rule them all. unfortunately, we are too bloated on thick industrial strength chocolate to try it

we powerwalk through greenwich, catch a glimpse of NYU, make a few stops, then end up in the east village for some vintage shop scouring. everything’s too expensive. i dig this boutique, but the prices remind me that it’s not meant to be. we break for a snack at this quaint little charmer, bruschetteria. not a bad concept. tasty too!

we crash at cynthia’s pad, admire the playboy covers wall that her roommates put up, and collectively nap. then, we head to dinner at the immensely popular lil’ frankies. being amongst the vibrant night lifers on the bustling streets, and seeing every single restaurant in the neighborhood packed, leads me to conclude that there really is a different lifestyle in NYC. people eat out. a lot. and they don’t get started til much later

sure, at this point we’ve eaten enough to energize a third world country, but why stop? stephen recommended chikalicious, a dessert bar, but alas, we are too late. disappointment is quelled with a consolation prize: we can enjoy its smaller, humbler sister, puddin, across the street, for some namesake sweets.

try a little tenderness

on the way back to the metro via st. mark’s place, we discover that this gnarly vintage shop, search & destroy, is still open. yes! i love late-night shopping. it’s run by some handsome japanese punks. i spy some great goods, including a special coat that doesn’t fit my frame. stupid big frame. i try to distract myself from the pain by trying on some awesome (but creepy) full-face beanies (hot and scratchy). there are a bunch of designs, including scuber diver and ninja face ones

my mom reminded me that today marks my grandpa’s birthday. i felt bad for not remembering.

here’s the snappy dresser in one of my favorite shirts of his. i’m confident i inherited some of my thrift shop / garage sale sensibilities from him. how badass is that western top? check the quality embroidery!

i’m not just saying this cuz he was my grandpa and i’m editorializing with affection, but this guy was a real character. he’d have no reservations with busting out in song and dance anytime, anywhere. a dapper chap, he was also a hit with the ladies at the senior center. he partook in a healthy regimen of karaoke, ballroom dancing, and chinese herbal medicine. charismatic, a bit idiosyncratic, and not necessarily “traditional.” legend has it that he was the one who chaperoned the toddler me on a trip from georgia to california. a few years ago i finally visited my birth place and saw the former site of his first job in the states: some greasy spoon restaurant, where he washed dishes. a middle-aged chinese guy from taiwan doing a menial job…in the south…and we’re not talkin’ in a city like atlanta either. you gotta wonder what that was like.

every year around this time we would gather to celebrate his bday. sometimes it was a bit of an annoyance to make the trek to the south bay, to have an encroachment on my personal free time. i’m not proud for acknowledging any of this awfulness, but it’s all sad and true. i can be a shamelessly selfish person.

true to human nature, i now wish i could commemorate gramps’ birth with him in full-blown, festive glory. we’d go aaaaaaall out. thinking about it now, i realize how fun it would be, and that’s the depressing part. i assure you, there’d be more revelry and cheer than what is expressed in the pathetic dour mug below.

even though it’s strange to be posting this a million years after the fact, i refuse to abandon my commitment to tedious vacation reportage.

in the morning, we traverse central park from the east to the west. it’s relatively quiet and the earth is moist. sadly, christina doesn’t get to see any of the big landmarks, except for like, some castle and the great lawn

after much deliberation the night before on where to have brunch in the upper west side, i settle on sarabeth’s, famous for their baked goods. here i am enjoying quiet possibly the best cream of tomato soup ever. velvety, indeed.

lemon ricotta pancakes (fragrant and sweet), and a boring farmer’s omelette. the ingredients are great, but they don’t coalesce. also, those are excellent homemade english muffins

excitement mounts as we enter the museum of natural history. this is one of the greatest places in the world. plus, it’s romantic, no? i am thrilled for my sister to experience it. we take about a million photos. it’s enough to warrant its own separate entry

scary how their eyes are closed, but they appear to be slightly smiling. a little too moribund

bats! i love bats! again, strange presentation, especially given how everything else is displayed. this is part of the “animals of new york” installation, in some small hallway connecting the galleries

FIERCE. christina loves owls

hilarious how all the lemurs have the meanest, nastiest faces! they’re about to scratch your eyes out

introducing the surinam toad, one of nature’s ugliest, most revolting inventions. i distinctly remember this creature from my first time here years ago. as much as its appearance will make your skin crawl, its brilliant reproductive engineering will also make you marvel. babymama’s eggs get embedded into her back. when the little dudes hatch they emerge from these pits on her back. disgusting. take a close look

god, who DOESN’T LOVE DINOSAURS?!

cynth asks, “why is his pelvis bone so huge?” guess you could say he’s a well-hung chap

cynthia says, “check out the toupee on that schmuck”

leaves….LEEEEEEEEAVES

move along. no sexual innuendo here, none whatsoever

the hall of biodiversity. basically the coolest thing ever constructed. don’t get me started

for all the shark lovers in the house

battle! i like the scars on the sperm whale

we leave the magical land of awesome and stop by zabar’s, a densely packed market / gourmet food shop. the cheese section is astounding. it’s a tiny space, almost impossible to navigate, so you can sense tensions flaring with all the shopping/foot traffic collisions

still on the west side, heading north toward harlem. channeling peter parker/tobey maguire on the steps of columbia university

something the yin sisters are quite adept at: the awkward self-portrait

taking a break in st. nicholas park

i like this

there’s neat architecture in harlem

here’s astor row. note the patios

taking a well-deserved break

we almost make it into amy ruth’s, our dinner destination, but the gravitational pull of a sneaker store (“training camp”) is too powerful. cynth buys two pairs for a great deal. i spy a pair of alifes — usually not my cup of tea — and fall in love. unfortunately, the $150 pricetag aborts all hope

shoe shopping works up a ravenous appetite, and we are ready to take on amy ruth’s

it does not disappoint. fried chicken with a honey glaze, zesty buttery mashed taters, and mac n cheese (good, but there’s a subtly sweet aftertaste that turns me off)

chicken n waffles with pan gravy on the side. the waffle could stand powerfully on its own. same goes for the flavorful crunchy chicken. PERFECT

at this point, we are ready to die happy and bloated from delicious gluttony

every metro station has its own look and feel. this one has a colorful mosaic mural of historical black figures. of course, christina takes a pic with billie holiday, her all-time fave

a handy legend

a scary ECU of me and ella

we end up back in the upper west side at this irish pub called parlour. cynthia’s friend is having a fundraiser in the basement. we meet some of them

i’d say that makes for a pretty eventful day

april 5 marks a chinese holiday — qing ming jie — the clear and bright festival. aka tomb sweeping festival, all souls day, festival for tending graves, grave sweeping day, chinese memorial day, tomb sweeping day, spring remembrance.

my mom adheres to this age-old tradition, so we’ll be going to skylawn cemetary tomorrow. ever since my popo (grandma) died in 1997, it’s been a custom we’ve observed. with my gong gong’s (grandpa’s) somewhat surprising death a few years ago, ma’s tenacity to stick to the ritual picked up ten-fold. she and my sis can tell you how difficult it is to get me to participate. it’s like pulling teeth, or dragging a pet into the vet’s office. even though i respect the idea behind qing ming jie and it appeals to my gloomy sensibilities, it’s depressing as hell!

first, christina does a bang up job on cleaning the gravestones. she uses elbow grease and car cleaning agents to get them nice and glossy. garden shears are used to trim the grass encroaching upon the stones. i wish i was a trooper like her

lookin good

ma treats her parents to their favorite meals, canned drinks, and snacks. she usually picks up these vittles from ranch 99 on our way to the cemetary, which is nestled on a hill between san mateo and half moon bay

with incense in hand, ma recites a medley of buddhist prayers and personal, heartfelt salutations. she asks grandma and grandpa to watch over the family and friends, to ensure we do well in life, thrive on good health, and of course, find good husbands. basically she reminds them to have our backs

of course, the deceased need to live it up too! so we burn joss paper — “ghost money” — for them to party it up in what my ma endearingly calls “happy land.” it’s like wiring $crilla to them but in a parallel universe, supernatural sort of way. it’s not just money; there’re paper/cardboard articles of clothing, houses, cell phones, credit cards, and almost anything else you can think of. i once saw a joss specialty store in chinatown, and was stunned by the massive selection!

this is a cool and clever concept, to take care of them by sending them materialistic goods so they can enjoy their afterlives. but it’s also the most heartbreaking and salient reminder of the fact that our loved ones are gone. i think i can partly attribute my nebulous belief in “spirits” to this

awww yeah. flossin’ with “hell bank notes”

we can’t help but monkey around. we don’t think grandpa would mind

it’s a nice view from atop skylawn cemetary, and it’s close to the ocean. i have to say, my mom did a good job finding a resting place for her parents

now that i’m older (though certainly not mature), i have learned the importance of taking this stuff more seriously. i’m making an earnest effort to tone down the stubborn “why do i hafta?!” behavior when mom says it’s time to go visit the grandparents. i often wonder if i can maintain the tradition and do the same for my mom as she has for her parents. my selfishness renders me incapable of conveying this kind of devotion and love. regardless, it’s something i’ll have to do. and if i ever get lazy about it, christina will surely get my butt into gear.

**ps – according to wiki, this year is the FIRST TIME the people’s republic of china can celebrate qing ming jie! it wasn’t allowed before because the chinese communist party had classified it as a superstition.

my talented cousins have crafted an eloquent video message regarding valentine’s day. so folks, if you’re in a bind about what to do for your shawty / boo on this very special day, then pay close attention to these wise fellas.

the production is part of their new, fun venture called inconceivable tv. they make me proud!

ps – guess what my favorite parts are

a thoughtful lunar new year gift from a coworker

walking home the night of LNY, i stumbled upon this neat credenza-esque piece on the street and had to have it. what an auspicious start to the year already! endless thanks to knuckles for coming to the rescue and transporting it for me

later that evening, we convened at peg’s for an intimate celebration of the new year. here she is, the hostess with the mostest, slaving over a hot stove in her good luck red. she’s a master at griddling up rice cakes so they’re crisp and golden. the alluring smell beckons anthony to pull up a front row seat

the requisite tray of candied goods. my fave = the coconut straw

“i’ve been everywhere in the world but there”

pretty

hao contemplates next to the quince that peg picked up from the flower fair. that girl does it right

sauce bar!

dumplings, green onion pancake, rice cake, sweet sesame dumplings (tang yuan) = symbolic starch $ex

the real dessert…
tada!

feast your eyes on this LNY beauty: hellen in a handsome hanbok. it was the first time she’d worn this exquisitely made garment from korea, and we were all very lucky to be privy to such a special moment.

strike a pose

a regal double whammy

nothing to do with culture or LNY or nothin,’ but peg is my go-to eye drops administrator

let us feast!

fran and derek

i love peg’s ceiling. soft colors and textures

more citrus to wish everyone a healthy, positive year. thanks for being in my life!

happy year of the rat!

i feel like a crappy jerk posting killjoy content (what can i say, i’m attracted to anything morbid), so here are some photos from the year of the boar to get into the lunar new year spirit.

“why hello there. welcome to my abode. please, make yourself at home. are you ready to kick it yin style, wicked, wild?”

the maestra in the kitchen, making one of our favorite dishes: steamed egg. sesame oil drizzle fo shizzle

colorful and auspicious!

ain’t no party like a good luck fish party

we love this dessert, ba bao fan (“eight treasure rice”). difficult to make, but of course nai nai has mastered the art

tomfoolery, which nai nai lightheartedly tolerates (on the surface, at least)

ah yes. the red envelope

nai nai is crafty and likes to construct intricate little cranes which are nice decorative flourishes!

that’s sliced lotus, which my sister loves. nai nai usually serves these lotus discs stuffed with slightly sweet glutinous rice. a real delicacy

the only things missing are our chinese lawyer / engineer / doctor boyfriends or husbands
(ps – note our predilection for loud patterns)

like father like daughter

aaaaaaand that’s how us yins do it. about ten pounds heavier, with wacky chinese new year television programming commanding all of our attention